Finished

I completed "no make up april" and it feels so good! (with 1 exception, my friends wedding!)

It was definitely a journey but I'm so glad I completed it! My friend, Ashly knows how to give a good challenge AND to be super supportive in the process! I told Ash that at first it felt like falling but I just needed to trust my parachute (ie. Jesus, my hubs, and my self worth!)

This time made me think that perhaps I can challenge and change some things in my life a bit more often...but I also told Ash to "leave me alone" for a month ;) 

It's hard to be uncomfortable, it's hard to rely so much on a silly routine and crash of culture. It's hard to look in the mirror some times and not like what you see BUT I learned you can do all of that. You can step out of the "normal" and still be confident, shine, improve, and show the world "Yes, I'm comfortable in my own skin that God gave me!"

So, here's to challenges, journeys, and the chance to see yourself in a new light. Thanks for pushing me Ash :)

Tired

I feel tired...tired of just about getting our head above water and then getting dunked again...tired of feeling like I'm back peddling at times...tired of trying really hard and then still feeling like I can't succeed...

We lost another part of our income last night. A cleaning account that my family has had for 20 years. They just sent a letter, telling us we're done this weekend....can they do that?! I mean, I guess they can, but really? No warning what so ever. Done. 

Call me nuts, but I almost feel like I let my family down (I know I didn't, but 20 years is a long time) The irony is, I never liked cleaning the place and then low and behold, I'm the kid that ends up owning the account as an adult. It was just that little bit to be put to savings, or the unexpected bill, or heck, maybe a date every now and then...

I know what my first response should be, God has something for us, but that's not sitting with me right now. Thank the Lord I have my Mk who constantly reminds me of that. Thank the Lord we have our health, our family, our friends, our church and a roof over our heads.

This is another chapter in our book...but it kinda sucks...

Beauty

I'm sure you've seen this going around, but isn't it so applicable to my "no make-up" challenge?!

Today is a fun day though, my friend is getting married so i get to have a cheat day and wear make-up :)

Happy weekend!

annoyed

Today I woke up annoyed...I don't know why?! And to make it worse, my hubs woke up super happy....I dislike that we can't always just be in the same mood as each other. Wouldn't that make life so much easier?! 

I feel a lot of things bubbling up in me...I feel a need for some refreshment.

My mentor was asking me the other day, what do I do to feel refreshed? How do I rejuvenate  myself. I couldn't answer :( Does any one have something they do to feel refreshed? It's a great question and I hope to figure it out soon :)

My mom comes in less than 30 days and I'm SOOOO excited! I haven't hugged my mom in almost a year :( Even when I was living in England, I was averaging more than that! 

Make-up: it's still missed in my life BUT, I've also found that I don't notice it as much. I miss mascara the most I think, but I have been able to see that I can indeed live with out it :)

My friends and co-worker are adopting!!!! I'm so excited for them :) They will be awesome parents who will teach their child to love the Lord, how much they love them, and be a great example of a couple that serves together. They are in the process of raising the funds to bring their child home (holy smokes adoption is expensive!) If you want to hear more of their story and help in some way,
stop on by and see for yourself what a great couple they are! Finding Sunday

Here's to another busy week!

Smart phone

So, I was talking with a Friend the other day about feeling really insecure about this whole make-up thing and how social media doesn't help.... You look around fb and instagram and all you see is "perfect" people and lives....(remember that whole comparing issue I have?!)

Well, part of the problem comes in, with the fact, that I'm always checking these things: right when I wake up, on the pot, in the car, etc.... am I missing out on: talks with my hubs, beauty surrounding me, phone convos with fam and friends, etc?!

So, in an effort to keep on going and finding joy and contentment in my own life, I deleted the fb app on my smart phone (see, silly smart phones aren't always a good thing. Remember the good ole' days when we didn't have apps, therefore couldn't be checking things all the time!) I'm not saying I've given it up all together, I just don't have it at my fingertips at all times...

woah, what's going on with me?! no make-up AND no fb app?!
                                        

   (yikes, scary!)

This was also a good relevant magazine

Love

This song hits hard a lot...this week it's applicable again :) 

Jesus, knows my name!? Wow! He loves me as I am, He knows me for who I REALLY am (and continues to love me any way :) ) He doesn't care what I look like. 

Lord, please allow this to sink into my heart and mind and realize that this is enough!

I'm worried about my first weekend with no make-up....I have a few events that I REALLY want to feel more put together at...but, here's to pressing on and making the most of it. Hopefully there's not a lot of mirrors around ;)

Ouch....

Yeah, um....this experience is already a bit painful. It's bringing worry and anxiousness and a little panic...Is that ok?!

Is that weird that not wearing make-up is bringing that up in me?
I look at other girls and wish I had their skin or their looks....

I have to keep telling myself to stop comparing...that is a HUGE problem for me.

Mirrors suck I've decided. I'm fine until I'm by one. Then I'm reminded and I frown...

Hopefully by the end of this, I will not even notice. I want to just be comfortable in my own skin!

Thank you Lord for my face :) For choosing for me to look the way I do. For a husband that tells me I'm beautiful no matter what.

Geeze, way to go world, making us girls CRAZY! 

Scared...

So my friend Ashly has come up with the CRAZY challenge, to go make-up free for one month...she suckered me in to it....(not really, but kinda...) 

The reason being, to discover how God and other's truly see us. Not just because we look good or are dressed a certain way or because of the (fake) confidence that make-up gives you. To search deep with why and how He loves us. To search deep with who see's our value in who we are and not just want we look like.

I'm scared...seriously, I was laying in bed last night, trying to go to sleep after an exhausting week, and all I could think about, were different things I have going on this month that I'm REALLY gonna wish I had some make-up on. 

We are allowing some cheat days; i.e. my friend is getting married so i'm allowed to wear make up to the wedding.

But still, have I really been hiding behind the goop on my face? Does it really make me feel better or even look better?

I made Mk promise to encourage me along the way, cause after all, I really just need him to find me beautiful :) 

I will hopefully remember to document my experience here but we will see what kind of emotions come out of this challenge!

And so begins, a month of searching out what TRUE beauty is!

A memorable day

My savior lives! My savior died for you and for me! My savior is good, right, just, true, and the keeper of my heart!

Taste and see that the Lord is good, blessed is the one who takes refuge in him-Psalm 34:8

Image found: on google

Rain....

It's so strange, always the week before my birthday, it's like 75 and I think "great, sunny bday party :) " and then, the rain comes and my bday is cold and rainy....now this might be normal in other places, but so cal?! WHY, WHY WHY???? I'm suppose to have an epic party tomorrow and OUTDOORS! Gee, hope it's clears up!

I realize how much the weather really can play with my mood...I need to fight against that! Especially since I'm grateful for a wonderful hubs, that I get to have THREE of my five siblings around AND celebrate with all my dear friends!

Lord change my attitude please :)

But...rain rain, go away, come again another day!!!!!

Honesty

I love when you can have a real, crazy, soul lifting, HONEST, convo with friends! 

Last night, I was able to share with my beautiful friends, honest things. I woke up this morning feeling encouraged, loved, light hearted, and ready to take life on with fresh perspective!

I'm thankful for the friends I have in my life. I'm thankful that God has given me godly, caring, fun, women in my life, that encourage, stretch, and care for me! They also fill my heart with such joy as they come to our home and find relaxation here.

I would encourage everyone, take a step, share something honest with a person you trust. It's good for the soul. It encourages the sharer and the listener. It builds trust and relationship. It lets you see why God allows us to have friendships and relationship. Trust me, it is good!

Soundtrack

Yesterday was a bit of a blah day for me....I hate when I have days like this.
I felt:
 irritated
dissatisfied
sad
worried
unhappy
and I was comparing myself to so many others....that's probably my worst habit! I compare way too much.

Most of the things I long for and desire, I dont see as bad things, but they do distract me quite often. Oh man, if only I could just train myself to see all the good around me all the time. I need to see myself and my life, through Jesus eyes! Be grateful Rebecca!

So, sometimes I do wish there was a soundtrack accompanying me through life. I was listening to music and realized how much that would help those around me (specifically MK) to understand what I'm feeling in the moment....but that's just a silly dream :) 

I'm trying so hard to look on the bright side and be thankful for the "much" that I have...What a process!

Continuing on...

Timing

I've been learning a lot in the last year about Timing. Nothing seems to be in my timing, timing is everything, timing hurts, timing is surprising, timing makes me anxious, timing is hard to accept, timing...

You know how we're suppose to trust in God's timing?! We're suppose to know that his timing will work it out? Well, that's probably one of the hardest things for me. I like to plan. I like to have  an idea of what's going on. I like to have a little bit of control. That's not how God see's fit for me most of the time....

I've been processing the changes and timing's in my/our life right now and have started to see some of the good in God's timing.

We didn't go buy a house and therefore in this season of job hunting, we don't have to stress about a house payment (just rent :) )

We prayed and waited for a job for me and now I'm getting to have one of my favorite jobs ever!

We didn't rush into kids, so our season of just being married has brought a lot of growth, love and time.

We prayed for a church where we can grow, serve, and have community in and now are a part of the best church.

We allow each other to still be the person we were BEFORE marriage and are learning how to become one IN marriage.

Timing. Not always my favorite thing, but when you stop to reflect, it can be perfect!

2013!

Happy New year!
This is actually just a reminder to me, so that I remember the HAPPY part! I want to remember this year as HAPPY. Last year had it's not so HAPPY parts....but that's the joy of a new year! I have lots of ideas and need to prioritize them! I'm learning the older I get, the more I like fresh starts, new beginnings, and small changes! (notice I said small, I still don't care for big changes very much BUT small ones are ok!)

Life is certainly a journey and I hope to enjoy it :)

seasons

come and go. We are IN my favorite season, we are OUT of a rough season, and I'm looking forward to all the WONDERFUL things that are coming up!

Thank goodness there's the ability to change or i would go mad! I still don't always deal too well with changes around me but when you go through a rough patch, you can see change as a blessing!

I'm thankful...

100!

Happy 100 post to me! :) 

Here's some recent projects I've done, that I love! Most are inspired from Pintrest and others from blogs! I like to still add my own touches, so there's a uniqueness to them still :)

My own idea. My bridal bouquet...I will ALWAYS cherish this!

I got this idea from Daisy girl! My idea is to mark the places as we go! I just need to find a frame big enough now to hold it....

And lastly, I saw this idea on andersonfamilycrew! Loved it and now I'm obsessed with wanting to make it for every one I know! :)

Thank goodness for wonderful DYI projects! I love making my home, homey-er :)

More than I could imagine....

...things have changed LOADS! I can't even totally grasp everything! I have a new job, I'm able to breathe easier, I feel refreshed after a jaunt around California, I'm starting to commune with God again (that's been hard for a while...) and I am reminded that I am indeed, loved!

I'm thankful I've kept this "journal" of sorts, for me to realize all the change and be able to look back on it! I will post about our trip in a few days! Glad there's no pressure here!!!!!

 * I saw this on my Mom's fb....sorry, I don't know the source!

All good things must come to an end...

The streak ended this week...my hubs and I were apart for the FIRST TIME since being married! We made it a whole year with out spending the night apart! Now, don't get me wrong, we're not totally attached at the hip, we have gone out with friends or done other things with out each other, just always came home to each other! We love each other so much and just have adored having this time together!

Of course on our first time apart though, there would be an earthquake! I don't get too freaked out, as long as someone is with me! But being alone....are you serious?! I had to call my mum....she lives in another state...but gracefully she calmed me down and let me cry on the phone for a bit.

This time has really put into prospective the love I have for my hubs. The things I value about him. The little things I pick on that are super meaningless :) How much I relay on HIM (like having someone to sit next to in church :) ) I love what he brings to my life. I love that this time has also been a reminder that, I need to relay on the Lord more than MK...but that's hard, cause MK seems so much more tangible some times....

I love my MK and so glad he's almost coming home!!!!!

Thankful

Last night I was reminded of how VERY thankful for our amazing small group I am! I had a nagging headache all day and really didn't feel like going....

The truth is, I was tired of sharing what I feel like, is another douse of "bad news".....(I really did have a headache too!) BUT, they listened to MK and me, they prayed for us, and assured us that they love us, care for us, and aren't turning into "those friends" who do nothing but complain and tell sob stories!

I'm trying so hard to believe in God's grace and sufficiency, I'm trying so hard to actually believe their is a purpose for all these things we've been going through....

I'm trying to believe.

Time of my life!

Family Vaca was SO fun! I will hold all the dear memories in my heart, for a long time! I'm still blown away that we got to go! Now, back to real life.....

Here's a little photo love!